Letters to God: Thank you

Hey Family,

I know you all are waiting on the next post of our study, but I just had to share this prayer with you guys. I promise I am working on the next installment, but I just wanted to share this with you.




Dear Abba,

You are great. There are no words to describe how amazing you are. I am so happy to have a father like you. No one compares to you and I can’t believe we put things above you. You love us and provide everything, even when we do not deserve it. You are mercy, grace, life, and above all love. Thank you for being Elohim, the one true God. Thank you, Abba! For loving me, forgiving me, and saving me. You are truly the best. I love you, father. And I want to love you more. I want to fix my eyes on you. I want to fix my eyes on what is unseen because what I can see is temporary.

Lord, I want to pray for the world. I know the solution to the evil that is going on is you. The government is providing services for its secular world, people are believing in any and everything other than you, and I know I need to pray for the world. People have addictions, sex, drugs, the violence, corruption, Lord, the list goes on forever and I pray that your will, will be done here. I also pray for our entertainers, father. They have a heavy influence over the world and I pray that they use their influence to point to you. I pray that your church is glorified so that we may glorify you. I pray that we bring people to you; that we are your hands and feet.

Abba, I pray that you bless me. That I am able to glorify you. For you are Jehovah Jireh, the Lord will provide, and I pray that you provide me with financial intelligence, that I have food on my table, clothes on my back, shoes on my feet, and a roof over my head. Lord, I ask that you provide me with all me needs because I know without you I have nothing. Give me your daily bread father. Give me the desire to seek you father. I want to have the desire to be closer to you, Lord. You promised that if we seek first the kingdom then you will add to us, and I want to inherit all that you have promised me, Lord.

Abba, I want to also pray for forgiveness. Without your mercy and free gift of grace I would be hopeless. I need your grace. I want to live for your grace. I am a wrench. I am a sinner. I love to think about sex, I love being a narcissistic who is consumed with myself, I like being mean to others, I love to make people feel low so I can feel high, I love having my way, I like the feeling of getting over on people because I think I’ve won. Lord, and without your forgiveness of my wicked ways I would have no hope for change. Without your love, mercy, and grace I would rely on myself to be saved. Without your forgiveness God, I would continue to think I can do it all on my own. I thank you for your forgiveness because now I can forgive, Thank you for being Jehovah Mekoddishkem, the Lord who sanctifies you.

I pray that you guide us. You are Emmanuel, God with us, and we need you to lead us. Thank you for listening to me and caring for me. I am grateful to serve a master, that I can cast all of my anxiety on you because you care. You care.


Your daughter,



Family, I hope you all are praying to become closer to the Father. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend.


1 Chronicles 16:1(AMP): Seek the Lord and His strength; yearn for and seek His face and to be in His presence continually!

Psalm 4:1 (TLB): O God, you have declared me perfect in your eyes; you have always cared for me in my distress; now hear me as I call again. Have mercy on me. Hear my prayer.

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Add this to your playlist

Hey family!

I haven’t forgotten about you guys, I’ve just been a little busy. You know how life seems to like to keep us busy. And well, I was in the middle of writing up the next part of who are they? and I just couldn’t get this song out of my head! So I decided to share it with you guys. I love this group and this song is just awesome. Hope you enjoy.

Artist: For King and Country

Song: Fix my eyes

Album: run wild. live free. love strong.

Chorus: I’d Love like I’m not scared
Give when it’s not fair
Live life for another
Take time for a brother
Fight for the weak ones
Speak out for freedom
Find faith in the battle
Stand tall but above it all
Fix my eyes on You
On You



Hebrews 12:1-2 (NIV): Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God

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Letters to God: Almost giving up

Hey family! I wanted to share something very personal with you guys. So, I write letters to God on my laptop. Since I’m on my computer so much, I figured this was a good way to pray daily. And well, I wanted to share a snippet of a previous prayer. If you guys follow the blog, then you’ll know that this was written at time that I was very sad (I wrote a post talking about my sorrows), and well this was my prayer.


1:25 pm (usa cst)

Dear Heavenly Father,

I love you, I love you so much, and desire to love you more. It’s crazy how lately I’ve had feelings of discouragement or giving up, and today in my daily Bible reading, I read in the book of Acts chapter 12. In this chapter you sent an angel to deliver Peter from the hands of Herod. Peter was in prison about to be put to death and you freed him. Reading this I couldn’t help but see the parallel of Peter’s problem and my own. Lately, I’ve been feeling so discouraged with my life and almost feel as if I’m drowning, suffocating in my distress, and I realize how only you can free me from the weight of this world. Only you can give my soul rest, peace. This world and its expectations will weigh me down every time. I have to keep my eyes on what’s more important, Father, and that’s You. I have to stop living for tomorrow or Friday or the summer or the next holiday. I have to start living for eternity! At the end of the day none of this matters. All that matters is if I loved you, my Lord with all of my heart, my mind, and my strength. Thank you, Father, for continuously blessing me. You are more than enough and I apologize for allowing this world to distract me from this truth.

Thank you Father



Now, you all can see my style when I talk/pray with the Lord, and I know He hears me. I wanted to leave you all with a song I think really helped me get through this time. Enjoy!

Artist: Unspoken

Song: In your hands

Album: Unspoken

Chorus: Every sorrow (promise), I leave it in Your hands
Every sickness (healing), I leave it in Your hands
All my failures (and my future), I leave them in Your hands
Amen, I leave it in Your hands


With Love


John 16:33 (ESV): I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world



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Who are they? Part 6

Hey Family!

I hope you all enjoyed the holiday, and I hope you all haven’t forgotten about the study! I have a few more parts to this study. I really appreciate your patience and endurance during this one! With that being said let’s dive in!

Name: James son of Zebedee, called James the Greater

Hometown: Capernaum

Occupation: fisherman

References: Matthew 10:3, 17:1-3; Mark 3:18, Luke 6:16, 9:52-56; Acts 12:1-2


  • Left everything to follow Jesus
  • His love for our Savior lead him to be the first martyr


  • Deserted Jesus during His trail and crucifixion

Interesting Fact:

  • Brother of John son Zebedee (see below)
  • Not to be confused with James, the son of Alphaeus/ the brother of the Lord (the other apostle) who wrote the book of James (learn about James the less in Part3)
  • Probably the older brother since always mentioned first
  • Fisherman business partner with Simon-Peter
  • Jesus called the Zebedee brothers the “Sons of Thunder” because when a Samaritan village rejected Jesus, the brothers wanted to call down fire from heaven to the place
  • One of 3 men in Jesus’ inner circle (along with brother John and Simon-Peter)
  • Preached the gospel in Spain


  • First Apostle martyred (Acts 12:1-2)
  • Beheaded by King Herod



Name: John

Hometown: Capernaum

Occupation: fisherman

References: all four gospels, in the book of Acts, and narrator of Revelation


  • Left everything to follow Jesus
  • Only apostle present at the cross
  • Wrote multiple books(5) in the New Testament


  • Lack of understanding of Jesus’ message of forgiveness

Interesting Fact:

  • His older brother is James (see above)
  • Fisherman business partner with Simon-Peter
  • Wrote 5 books of the New Testament –The Gospel according to John, the three Epistles of John, and Revelation
  • The gospel according to John is different from the other 3. He repeatedly emphasize that Jesus is the Christ, the son of God, the Savior, sent by the Father, the lamb of God
  • In the gospel according to John Jesus repeatedly refers to himself as “I am” to identify himself with the Great “I AM”
  • Scholars speculate that he was the cousin of Jesus
  • Scholars believe Jesus trusted him to take care of His mom, Mary (John 19:27)
  • Him and his brother earned the nickname Boanerges (meaning sons of thunder) because when a Samaritan village rejected Jesus, the brothers wanted to call down fire from heaven to the place
  • One of 3 men in Jesus’ inner circle (along with brother John and Simon-Peter)
  • Present during Jesus’ trial
  • Tradition holds that he was taken to Rome during a persecution and thrown into boiling oil but came out unhurt


  • Only Apostle to die of old age



Mark 3:17 (KJV): And James the son of Zebedee, and John the brother of James; and he surnamed them Boanerges, which is, The sons of thunder

Matthew 20:20 (KJV): Then came to him the mother of Zebedees children with her sons, worshipping him, and desiring a certain thing of him.



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Easier said than done

easier-said-than-doneWordPress Family! I feel like I’ve been going through so many things lately; the enemy has been working really hard to make me feel lonely and almost depressed, these days. So let’s talk about what’s been going on!

Family/Friends: I’ve been in this attitude mode lately, and well, I don’t really like people right now. Okay, not that I don’t like them, but I’m easily frustrated/irritated. These past few days I keep thinking about how people annoy me, and I end up taking my frustrations out on the people I love the most. I know it’s not the right thing to do, but I find myself rushing my mom off the phone or not answering a call from a friend that’s long winded. Sometimes (most of the time right now) I have to mentally remind myself that these people love me and wish the best for me.

School: I started my graduate school journey (again) in January and I thought it was the best move for me. Lately, I’ve been second guessing my decision. I’ve felt a sense of resentment towards the faculty and my advisor. I actually dread going on campus and walking into that lab. I’ve actually allowed this graduate program to steal my joy right now. There are days where I’ve become physically ill. I honestly get serious stomach problems only while I’m in grad school. I worry about my health and emotions of depression more than ever right now. Simply put: I’m just not happy. And since happiness is so circumstantial, I know I really need to depend on Jesus at a time like this.


Love: well, we all know I’ve been struggling with dating + trying to follow Christ. And, lately this feeling of loneliness has been hitting me hard. It seems that all (of course not all, but my mind sees it as all) of my friends are entering into these great relationships and although I am extremely happy for them, I can’t help but feel left behind. It’s like I’m at the school dance waiting on someone to ask me to dance and no one ever shows up. I keep asking God where is my guy? Where is my Christ loving-generous-appreciative-considerate-awesome-funny-handsome-sweet-family oriented-caring guy? I keep praying to God, for my heart’s desire and always feel as if I come up short. However, talking to my good friend, Nir2thee, I realized that I keep trying to tell God what I want instead of allowing Him to give me what I need. She told me that I need to pray for God’s desires on my heart, and NOT my own. And family, it has been a struggle. I realized that most of us are looking for a savior in our significant other. Someone to save us from: being lonely, financial conflict, sexual immorality, depression, feeling unloved (& the list goes on of course), but we have to realize that the only one that can save us is Jesus. I keep waiting on this list to show up and well, he’s just not coming. I need to learn to be totally satisfied and fulfilled through Christ because He is the only one that make me complete. This is why in Mathew 6:33 Jesus says to seek first the kingdom of God and all HIS righteousness and all things will be added to you. I need to seek God first. He will place His desires on my heart. It’s just easier said than done.

With Love,


Psalm 17:15 (ESV): As for me, I shall behold your face in righteousness; when I awake, I shall be satisfied with your likeness

Hebrews 13:5 (ESV): Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.

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Who are they? Part 5

Name: Philip

Hometown: Bethsaida, Galilee

Occupation: unknown

References: Matthew 10:3, Mark 3:18, Luke 6:14, Acts 1:13, John 1:43, 45-46, 48; 6:5, 7; 12:21-22; 14:8-9


  • Left everything to follow Jesus
  • Scholars believe he was first a disciple of John the Baptist
  • Sought salvation starting with John the Baptist which lead to following Jesus Christ


  • Deserted Jesus during His trail and crucifixion

Interesting Fact:

  • Jesus personally invited Philip to follow Him (John 1:43)
  • Recruited Bartholomew (Nathanael) –see part 4 for info on Nathanael
  • Jesus tested him when feeding the 5,000 by asking where could they but bread for so many people? (John 6:5-7)
  • Philip is last mentioned in Acts at the ascension of Jesus not to be confused by a deacon and evangelist names Philip who was mentioned later in Acts
  • Tradition holds that Philip preached in Greece, Syria, Phyrgia (in Asia Minor)


  • Martyred in Hierapolis by upside down crucifixion


Name: Judas Iscariot, the son of Simon (John 6:71)

Hometown: Kerioth a town in Judah

Occupation: unknown

References: Matthew 10:4; 13:55; 26: 14, 16, 25, 47-49; 27:1-5, Mark 3:19; 6:3; 14:10, 43-45, Luke 6:16; 22:1-4, 47-48, John 6:71; 12:4; 13:2, 26-30; 14:22; 18:2-6, Acts 1:16-18, 25


  • Left everything to follow Jesus
  • Was the money keeper of the group
  • Regretted decision to betray Jesus


  • Deserted Jesus during His trail and crucifixion
  • Greedy (betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver)
  • He was a thief (John 12:6)

Interesting Fact:

  • Iscariot in Hebrew is Ishkeriyyoth which means man of the village of Keriyyoth
  • He is only remembered for his betrayal of Jesus
  • He regretted the betrayal but never sought forgiveness so he ended his own life

o   It’s never too late to ask for forgiveness

  • However, Judas’ act was a part of God’s sovereign plan (Psalm 41:9, Zechariah 11:12-13, Matthew 20:18 and 26:20-25, Acts 1:16,20)


  • Suicide by hanging himself (Matthew 27:3-5)

I love poetry, and was elated when I found poets who spit for a purpose. Enjoy this poem family!

Peace and Love


Acts 3:19 (ASV):Repent ye therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out, that so there may come seasons of refreshing from the presence of the Lord

Isaiah 1:18 (ESV): “Come now, let us reason[a] together, says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool

Hebrews 10:17 (ESV): then he adds, “I will remember their sins and their lawless deeds no more.

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Who are they? Part 4

Name: Bartholomew, Nathanael

Hometown: Cana in Galilee

Occupation: unknown, some sources say a fisherman

References: Matthew 10:3, Mark 3:18, Luke 6:16, John 1:45-49, 22:2, Acts 1:13


  • Left everything to follow Jesus
  • Overcame his skepticism about the insignificance of Nazareth


  • Deserted Jesus during His trail and crucifixion

Interesting Fact:

  • Preached in modern day Iraq and Iran
  • Evidence shows preached in Greece and India
  • In Greek Bartholomew is a family designation which means son of Tolmai
  • Nathanael means God has given in Hebrew
  • Called by Phillip (John 1:46)
  • Tradition says he carried a translation of the Gospel according to Matthew to India
  • Jesus called him a true Israelite incapable of deceit and said that He noticed him under a fig tree before Phillip called him (John 1:47-48)


  • Martyred by flayed (skinned alive) and then beheaded
  • Other sources say flayed and crucified head down in Armenia


Name: Thomas, Didymus, called doubting Thomas

Hometown: unknown some sources say Galilee, Judaea

Occupation: unknown but some assume fisherman

References: Matthew 10:3, Mark 3:18, Luke 6:15, John 11:16, 14:5, 20:24-28, Acts 1:13


  • Left everything to follow Jesus


  • Deserted Jesus during His trail and crucifixion
  • Demanded physical proof of the resurrection despite the miracles

Interesting Fact:

  • Called doubting Tomas due to his unbelief of the risen Christ unless he could touch Jesus’ wounds (John 20:25)
  • Thomas comes from Toma, which means twin in Aramaic. The equivalent, Didymus means the twin in Greek
  • Preached the gospel in Mesopotamia, Babylon (in modern day Iraq), Parthia, and India
  • Considered father of the church in India
  • The Bible does not tell us who Thomas’ twin is
  • In the Book of Thomas (not a part of the Holy Bible) says that Thomas’ twin is Jesus (“Now, since it has been said that you are my twin and true companion, examine yourself…” –from the book of Thomas)

o   Let’s remember there are false writings and teachings. We must always remember that some books are not a apart of the Holy Bible for a reason, and if it does not align with the gospel, it should not be trusted

  • According to Catholic doctrine Thomas is the only Apostle to witness the Assumption of Mary into heaven

o   Again this is NOT found in scripture


  • Martyred by sword in India


Peace and Blessings


Romans 16:17 (ESV): I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them.


Hey just in case you missed one or just need a refresher, check out: Part 1 here, Part 2 here, and Part 3 here

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